Just Listen
by MdnightAngel237
Summary: Edward never came back and Bella started to release her feelings through writing songs. A year later she's a famous singer. What will happen when she meets the Cullens again? What will happen when she sees Edward again? Chapter 6 up!
1. Skin

**Disclaimer: I do not now nor will I ever own twilight or any of the characters. They belong to Stephenie Meyer.**

**Nor do I own the song, which is "Skin" by Alexz Johnson.**

**My first song fic so please be nice. I might add more chapters if it gets positive reviews.**

**Chapter 1: Skin**

Bella heard them introduce her on stage and took a deep breath preparing herself. She walked on stage and waved to the audience, when they saw her there was a thunderous applause and screaming, but that all quieted when the music started and she began to sing.

_**I drift away to a place  
Another kind of life  
Take away the pain  
I create my paradise**_

Singing this song never felt completely right to her, even though she had written it, some of the words she had wrote didn't seem to fit to her. Every time she sang it she laughed bitterly in her head, like the pain would ever go away, like she would ever be in paradise again.

_**Everything I've held  
Has hit the wall  
What I thought was mine  
Wasn't mine at all**_

Paradise was with him. And he was gone. She had thought that she was hers, he had told her he was hers but he didn't want her. Didn't want her to become a vampire, didn't want her to spend eternity with him, didn't want her love he just didn't want HER.

_**Falling apart, and all that I'm asking  
Is it a crime, am I overreacting**_

_**Oh, he's under my skin  
Just give me something to get rid of him  
I've got a reason now to bury this alive  
Another little white lie**_

She had fallen apart. She had barely managed to pull her self together again. Charlie had convinced (okay forced) her to see a therapist who convinced her to write all her feelings down. And out the came, in song, and they just kept coming. Even now. They came to her fairly easily. Because when Edward had left he had lied. He had said it would be like he had never existed, he had taken his pictures and his lullaby but there was one thing that he couldn't take or erase. Her memory and the love she had for him in her heart.

One might wonder how she went from writing songs for therapy to being on stage and actually singing them. To people buying tickets to watch and listen to her perform them. Well she wasn't to sure either. It had happened so fast. She had been singing at an open mike night at a coffee shop in Port Angeles and it just so happened that a music producer had been there. He wanted to give her a record-deal right then and there. At first she was hesitant but then a thought came to her. Her music showed her pain, if she signed a record deal her music would be put on the radio.

And if her music got put on the radio he would be sure to hear it. And maybe then he would understand the pain he caused her. And even though he didn't love her anymore maybe hearing her pain would hurt him. She just wanted him to know how much he hurt her.

_**I don't believe I'll be alright  
I don't believe I'll be OK  
I don't believe how you've thrown me away  
I do believe you didn't try  
I do blame you for every lie  
When I look in your eyes, I don't see mine**_

He had hurt her so much. The pain was indescribable. It was worse than the fire from vampire poison. It was something that she would never fully recover from. She knew that she would never fall in love again. She couldn't. Edwards leaving had been in vain, assuming that he had only left to protect her but he hadn't loved her either. Maybe that's what hurt the most. If he had left but still loved her it might have numbed the pain a tiny bit. Knowing that he was out there and still loved her.

Her lyrics said that she wanted him gone. But there was more to it than just that. She wanted him to love her again, she wanted him to come back again but if he wouldn't if he didn't, then she wanted the torturing to stop. The pain to go away. But she knew that wouldn't so she wanted to cause him pain, to let him hear what he did to her, by voicing her pain across the nation.


	2. Let Me Fall

**Disclaimer: I do not now nor will I ever own Twilight or any of it's characters. I also do not own the song, which is "Let Me Fall" by Alexz Johnson. **

**Here's Chapter 2. R&R. Any suggestions for the story (songs, plot twists, anything you want to happen, etc.) feel free to voice them. **

**Chapter 2: Let Me Fall**

_**I feel chained, chained down  
You shoved me to the ground  
I can't run, I can't shout  
Just let me out**_

A week ago her manager had called her into his office and told her that a hospital in Maine had called and asked if Bella would mind going there and singing to the children in the terminal illness ward. Bella had immediately agreed, those poor children, she hoped that her singing for them would bring them some happiness. Who knows how long some of those children had to live, weeks, days, hours maybe? Of course she would go, how could she not?

_**So heartless, this couldn't mean less  
Gonna push it in your face  
I'm only human  
And I've got something to say**_

So there she was, sitting on a stool in the middle of a large room singing one of her songs. The room wasn't really anything special; it seemed to be a kind of lounge for the kids. There were a few couches, a television, a foosball table and a ping pong table. Posters covered the walls, the kids' drawings, sayings, cards, and pictures. She wasn't really sure what city they were in; she had been focused on what he had told her about the children more than anything else. She had originally been planning on singing a happier song, but it turned out that she didn't really have any.

_**Let me rise, let me fall  
Let me breathe  
I wanna lose control, I'm not afraid to lose it all  
Let me break, let me crawl  
Cause I'll get back up again if you let me fall**_

It had surprised her at first; that the hospital had called her to sing there. She was a fairly new artist, and her songs weren't the happiest, they were all about her pain since HE left. She still couldn't say his name, she couldn't even think it. She couldn't figure it out why they called her. Not that she minded, in fact she loved the chance to go and cheer up these kids. She eventually just settled on that they hadn't been able to get another artist, but it still bothered her a little bit. She just got a weird feeling about coming here. Maybe it was because it reminded her of Forks, it wasn't as small but it was surrounded by forest and it was overcast likes Forks was. Forks seemed like so long ago; it was hard to believe that it had just been a few short months, that… Edward had left just 9 months ago. It felt like she hadn't been in Forks in a lifetime, but the pain from HIM leaving hurt like it had been yesterday.

Fire. That was a good word to describe it. Fire like when James had bit her hand. But it was worse; it was in her heart, all the time, it faded sometimes, when she sang, when she talked to fans. That helped, knowing that she was being heard, that her pain was being acknowledged and actually meant something to some people. Even if he did hear her songs, they probably wouldn't affect him. But that's what she lived on, the chance that he would hear them and the possibility that he would understand, that they would affect him in some way.

_**Can you hear me?  
Don't come near me  
You'll just get in my way  
I'm only human  
And there's nothing you can say**_

The song was about halfway over now. It was amazing how naturally performing had come to her. She barely even had to think while doing it, her mind always wandered elsewhere. It was the only time she could think about HIM without the pain overwhelming her, crushing her. So she did. Saying his name hurt the most but she was trying to work on that. She often wondered what she would write about if she didn't have all this pain leftover from… Edward. Her fans were always curious about the subject of her songs, who they were meant for. It was obvious that she had been hurt, badly and people were curious who it was. She never really gave them an answer though. She always just said someone from her past.

_**Let me rise, let me fall  
Let me breathe  
I wanna lose control, I'm not afraid to lose it all  
Let me break, let me crawl  
Cause I will get up again if you let me fall**_

It was amazing really, how famous she had become in the past few months. Yes she was new, but the emotion of her songs had gotten her noticed right away.

_**Say you know who I am  
And what I'm about  
Then you'll understand that I feel alone  
I live my own life**_

She always wondered what Edward's reaction was, or would be, it depends on whether or not he's heard any of her songs yet, but she wondered how he would react when he did hear them. She had kept her real name, even though many suggested that she take a stage name. She wanted to make sure that he knew who was singing. She wanted him to _know_ without a shadow of a doubt that it was her, Bella. The one he had left behind in Forks. Whom he had so cruelly strung along. She wanted him to be fully aware that it was her, and that she was singing to him.

The song was coming to a close now and she scanned the audience before her, taking in their little faces. Most were pale and tired looking but their eyes were bright and twinkling. Even though they were exhausted from fighting off their diseases they hadn't given up. They were still clinging to life, not willing to let go. Just like she had been unwilling to let go of Edward. He had been her life.

_**I will get up again if you let me fall  
Yeah, yeah, yeah  
Yeah, yeah  
If you let me fall  
If you let me fall  
Let me fall**_

As she finished the last note and took another look around the room she noticed one of the Doctors standing in the corner of the room. He was younger than the other doctors, and unlike the other doctor's who were watching the children with caring eyes, he was staring at her with sad eyes, concerned eyes. Topaz eyes that made her gasp and almost drop the microphone. Eyes that made her wrap her arms around herself to keep from falling apart. She took a sharp breath as he started to walk across the room to where she was now standing with her manager.

"Hello Bella, that was a wonderful performance, the children enjoyed it."

"Hello, Carlisle."


	3. Author's Note

Important Author's Note:

Sorry guys this isn't a new chapter. I haven't had time to work on it, I'm taking to AP classes this year and they have me kinda busy. I should have the new chapter up in a couple days, no later than Saturday. I'm not quite sure what song I am going to use for the next chapter so if you have any suggestions leave it in a review.


	4. A Memory

**Disclaimer: I don't own twilight or any of the characters. Nor do I own the song, which is "Once upon a Memory" by Dolly Parton.**

**Here's chapter 3. Edward will come into the story in the next chapter or so. I tried to make it longer for you guys. As always read and review. Any suggestions are welcome. **

**Chapter 3: A Memory**

Her manager looked a little surprised that Bella and Carlisle knew each other.

"Bella, Carlisle is the one who called to arrange this entire thing. I wasn't aware that you two were acquainted."

Bella smiled weakly at her manager, "I haven't seen him in a while. He and his family moved a few months before I met you."

Carlisle eyes looked sad, "Yes well it was all very sudden." He looked slightly uncomfortable.

Her manager, Ben, nodded "Okay well I'll go put in your cd and give you two some time to catch up." He walked away leaving Carlisle and Bella standing there watching each other, each unsure of what to do. They stood there a minute before Bella stepped forward to give Carlisle a hug.

"It's really good to see you Carlisle, I've missed you."

Yes when she first saw Carlisle the pain that threatened to tear her apart had reappeared, but briefly. This wasn't Edward, this was Carlisle. Carlisle was always wonderful to her; Edward was the one who broke her. Edward was the one who made the Cullens leave, not Carlisle.

Carlisle looked relieved and a little more comfortable. It seemed as though he had expected Bella to be unhappy to see him or he expected her to have a break down.

"Bella I was hoping that we would get a chance to talk." Bella's cd then began to play, not too quietly.

**_Once upon a memory_**

**_I kissed lips as sweet as honey_**

**_And lived in Heaven with an angel_**

**_For a little while_**

**_I knew love sweet and tender_**

**_In a world of perfect splendor_**

**_Once upon a memory_**

**_Before he said goodbye_**

"Perhaps we could go speak in my office? It's quiet and more private." Bella nodded. Privacy would be good, especially considering the topics that were bound to come up. She wrapped her arms around her waist in anticipation as she followed Carlisle through a door that connected his office to the room where not five minutes ago she had been singing about her pain over his son leaving her. Now this was going to be fun. NOT.

Carlisle's office was decent sized, he had a big wooden desk in the middle of the room with an office chair on one side, for him obviously, and two comfortable looking chairs on the other. A large built-in bookcase was one wall and he had a large office that gave a very nice view of the street.

Carlisle motioned for Bella to take a seat, to which she just shook her head, as he closed the door. He then went and leaned on the desk instead of sitting in his chair with the desk between them.

"It is wonderful to see you again Bella. The entire family has missed you terribly."

"Yes well I'm sure not the entire family, but I've missed the Cullen clan too."

Carlisle looked at her quizzically, "You'd be surprised Bella. Rosalie missed you too."

"I wasn't referring to Rosalie Carlisle, though I am surprised that she's missed me."

Even through the closed door they could still hear Bella's song, though it was a little muted.

_**Once upon a memory**_

_**In Never-Neverland**_

_**I had a love I that I'll**_

_**Never have again**_

_**A love like those**_

_**You read in fairy tales**_

_**Filled with joy and laughter**_

"Wait a second Bella; I'm a little confused, if you weren't talking about Rosalie, who in our family do you think doesn't miss you?"

Bella took a sharp breath and hugged herself tighter as she barely whispered his name.

"Edward"

Carlisle looked positively shocked when he heard her.

"Bella why in the world would you think that Edward doesn't miss you?"

Now Bella looked confused, "He doesn't love me. Why would he miss me when he doesn't love me?" She fought back tears as she spoke these words. She shouldn't have agreed to speak to Carlisle. Bad Idea.

"Bella why do you think that Edward doesn't love you anymore? Is that- Bella what did Edward tell you the day that we left? I need you to tell me exactly what he said."

Bella just shook her head and more of her song drifted in from the other room. A few tears started to slowly make a path from her eyes down her cheeks and she furiously wiped them away.

_**Oh, but he ended it**_

_**And it broke my heart**_

_**And I've cried forever-after**_

_**Once upon a memory**_

_**I knew love beyond compare**_

_**Oh, then his sweet lips**_

_**Lost their sweetness**_

_**And all that Heaven in his eye**_

_**Turned into a cold and distant stare**_

"Please Bella, can you tell me? I need to know what he said to you." Carlisle stood up and walked towards her. "Please Bella?" he asked again, putting his hand on her shoulder.

"H- He said that h-he di-didn't want me anymore. Th-That he didn't l-love me anymore. That I-I was no good for him." She started to sob now, and Carlisle pulled her into a comforting hug.

"Shhh –shh, Bella it'll be okay. It'll all be okay." He rubbed soothing circles into her back. There was a knock on the door and Carlisle pulled away.

Bella took a deep breath, and calmed herself as much as she could before calling "Yes?"

It was Ben, "Bella we should leave in about," there was a short pause, "fifteen minutes."

"Ok. We're almost finished." She heard him walk away, probably to check to make sure the equipment was being packed up correctly.

"I'm sorry Carlisle. I haven't had an easy time with things. It's been hard since Edward left. My music is what's helped me through it, if I hadn't started writing I don't know where I'd be."

"Please don't apologize Bella, there's nothing for you to apologize for. I'm glad that you've had your music, your rise to fame has been amazing, your songs truly are incredible, I just wish that they there wasn't so much pain in them."

"Blame your son, Carlisle." Anger flashed in Bella's eyes, something that surprised both of them.

"Yes, yes well, you might be surprised as well Bella. I am however, deeply disturbed from what you've told me."

_**Gone is the love, sweet and tender**_

_**A world of heartache knows no splendor**_

_**Oh, but once, once upon a memory**_

_**I knew love beyond compare**_

_**Yes, once upon a memory**_

_**In Never- Neverland**_

_**I had a love I know that I'll**_

_**Never ever have again**_

"Bella I'd like to ask you a favor, would you mind coming to dinner tomorrow night, and telling the others what you've told me today. Edward won't be there of course but I think that it's important for them to hear it from you."

Bella thought about it for a minute. She wondered how they didn't know, how this was new information to them but then again, she did miss them and she wanted to see them. Edward wouldn't be there either.

"Sure Carlisle, I think that that'll be possible. I should go; I'm staying at the Regency hotel if you need to get a hold of me." Carlisle gave her his address and she walked back into the main room, looking for Ben. There she heard the last bit of the song that had been playing. **(A/N ha-ha yeah I know long song)**

**_A love like those_**

**_You read in fairy tales_**

**_Filled with joy and laughter_**

**_But he ended it_**

**_And it broke my heart_**

**_And I've cried forever-after_**

**_Oh, but once, once upon a memory_**

**_I knew love beyond compare_**

**_That was once upon a memory_**

She was angry now. She was tired of the power he held over her, even now that he was gone and no longer loved her. I had been nearly a year and she still could barely say his name. Yes she loved him but if he came back now she wasn't sure if she could forgive him. How do you forgive the person that smashed your heart into a million tiny pieces? Now she wanted him to understand the pain that he's put her through, to feel it.

**So there it is, hope you like it. Sorry it took so long. I have chapter…its either 6 or 7 written, unfortunately I kind of skipped 4 and 5 so I have to get those done. And thanks to those who suggested songs. I had started writing the chapter with a different song but then I saw this one and thought it fit so well. **


	5. Can't Hate You

**Disclaimer: You all know that I don't own Twilight. Stephenie Meyer does. Nor do I own the songs that I use. **

**Chapter 4: Can't Hate You**

_**An empty room can be so deafening,  
The silence makes you wanna scream,  
It drives you crazy.  
I chased away the shadows of your name,  
And burned the picture in a frame,  
But it couldn't save me.**_

Bella walked into her hotel room and shut her door behind her. She looked around for a minute, trying to gather her thoughts, to not think about him for one minute. Okay so her room was more like a suite. It consisted of a small living room, a kitchen to one side and two doors on the other, leading to her bedroom and bathroom. She hadn't wanted a suite but now that she was staying a few days it might be kind of nice. Originally she was only supposed to stay one night, last night, but she had convinced Ben to stay a few more so that she could spend a little time with the Cullens.

_**You built it up,  
To watch it fall.  
Like I meant nothing at all.  
I gave and gave the best of me,  
But I couldn't give you what you need.  
You walked away,  
You stole my life,  
Just to find what your looking for.  
But no matter how I try,  
I can't hate you **_

_**...I can't hate you **_

_Well not all of them. One won't be there. _She clenched her jaw and forced herself to think his name _Edward won't be there. _She closed her eyes and took a sharp breath but managed not to collapse from the pain that threatened to tear her apart every time she thought about him. But that was part of the resolution she had made at the hospital, she was going to think about him. Not thinking about him and having to avoid anything that reminded her of him gave him too much power over her. And she was so angry at him for that but she still loved him.

She wiped the tears from her eyes and walked across the room to the desk by the window. She sat down and pulled out her notebook full of all the songs that she'd written since Edward had left. With a sigh, she flipped it open to the next blank page and began to write yet another one.

_**Your not the person who you used to be,  
The one I want who wanted me,  
And that's a shame but,  
There's only so many tears that you can cry.  
Before it drains the light right from your eyes,  
And I can't go on that way.  
And so I'm letting of everything we were,  
It doesn't mean it doesn't hurt.**_

_How could someone hurt you so much and yet you still love them? Does he even know what he did to me when he left? If he came back would I be able to forgive him for it?_ She laughed bitterly at her own thoughts. _If he was going to come back he would have come back by now. It's been a year. _That guy who had said goodbye wasn't the Edward that she had fallen in love with, though. That's something that she had held onto. At least it wasn't any part of him that he had shown her. She had to find a way to move on from this. He wasn't coming back.

_**You built it up,  
To watch it fall.  
Like I meant nothing at all.  
I gave and gave the best of me,  
But I couldn't give you what you need.  
You walked away,  
You stole my life,  
Just to find what your looking for.  
But no matter how I try,  
I can't hate you **_

Maybe going and spending time with the rest of the Cullens wasn't the best idea. She could just be putting herself in harms way again. Tearing apart any progress that she had made. But she had to go, had to see them. She missed them. Not as much as she missed Edward, but she still missed them. And maybe they could help her. Not to get him back, she didn't want him when she knew that he didn't want her. But he had broken her heart, shattered her. She wanted him to at least understand it, feel some remorse. Maybe he could explain to her why he had led her on for so long if he was just going to leave her. Maybe that was what she needed to move on, closure.

_**Sometimes you hold so tight,  
It slips right through your hands.  
Will I ever understand?**_

She knew that she'd never be able to love again. Edward was her soul mate and she had given everything she had to him. Maybe that was part of what had made her so angry now. Not just that he had left, not that he had so much power over her, even now with him gone. But that she had given everything to him, loved him with all her heart, and it just wasn't enough. But hadn't she always known that in her mind, that she wasn't good enough for him. He had just realized it too.

_**You built it up,  
To watch it fall.  
Like I meant nothing at all.  
I gave and gave the best of me,  
But I couldn't give you what you need.  
You walked away,  
You stole my life,  
Just to find what your looking for.  
But no matter how I try,  
I can't hate you **_

She glanced up at the clock. It was almost time to go to the Cullen's. She got up from the desk and looked up at the sky through the window. The clouds were thick, dark and close._ Looks like there's going to be a storm tonight_.

**The song is I Can't Hate You Anymore by Nick Lachey with a few minor adjustments.**

**Basically all I wanted to do in this chapter is to show how mixed her emotions are. She loves Edward still but she's extremely angry with him. She wants him to come back but she doesn't know if she'd be able to forgive him if he did.**


	6. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: I do not nor will I ever own Twilight or any of its characters. Nor do I own any of the songs used.**

**Okay I couldn't find a song I liked for this chapter so there is no song.**

**Chapter 5**

As soon as Carlisle opened the door to the house that the Cullens had bought in Maine he was greeted by a small, pixie-like, overexcited vampire.

"Did you see her? I mean of course you saw her, I _saw_ that, that's why I'm here! Is she okay? Did you talk to her? What did she say? Are we gonna get to see her –"

Carlisle cut her off "Alice slow down. Yes I saw her, and yes I talked to her and yes you will. She's coming over."

Alice shrieked and jumped up and down.

"Ooooh I've missed her so much! I can't wait to see her again! I still can't believe how idiotic Edward was being. I still can't believe any of us _agreed_ to his idea!"

They walked from the entryway to Carlisle's study. It was set up fairly similar to how he had had it at the house in Forks. He set down his bag and took a seat behind his large desk and looked at Alice seriously. Alice's expression grew worried as she took a seat across from him.

"Carlisle what is it?"

"It's Bella, Alice. I'm not sure that she's okay. What Edward wanted for her, I don't think it's happened. I don't think it will happen."

Alice's face fell, "I _TOLD_ him that Bella wouldn't react the way he wanted her too. Oh I shouldn't have promised not to check up on her."

"No Alice, don't blame yourself, I believe that we've all made mistakes. Alice there's more to it though, but I think that Bella should be the one to tell everyone. Speaking of which where are Esme and Jasper? Bella should be here in about an hour and I need to fill them in. Emmett and Rosalie should be here too but I don't know if they could get here in time…"

"Esme went to go look at some more antiques and Jasper went hunting. I wanted to be here when you got back. And actually when I saw you seeing Bella I called Emmett and Rose. Her eyes glazed over briefly, "Esme will be back in the next five minutes, Jasper in 12 and Emmett and Rose will be here in 23 or 36 minutes, depending on whether or not Rosalie makes Emmett stop at this boutique they're going to pass, she still hasn't decided."

Carlisle nodded, I'll tell Esme when she gets here and then Emmett, Rose and Jasper together."

"Should we call Edward?"

"I honestly don't know Alice. I'm not sure if that's a good idea."

Alice agreed. Maybe calling him and telling him to come home wouldn't be the best idea, but maybe there was something else she could do. She left Carlisle alone to his thoughts and went to her room.

38 minutes later

All of the Cullens, except Edward and Esme were seated in the living room at the Cullen's. Rosalie had decided to go to the boutique and right when they had gotten there they had been rushed to the living room so that they could be informed of the situation. Apparently when Alice had called she hadn't given any specifics, just that they had to come right away. Esme was in the kitchen cooking Bella dinner.

"So why are we here? What's going on? We were going to go to Austria" This was Rose.

"Rose you have eternity to go to Austria, this is important." Alice gave Rose an annoyed look.

"It's about Bella," Carlisle began.

"Bella?" Emmett immediately perked up. He missed his human little sister.

"Yes Bella. I saw her yesterday and she's coming over tonight, which is why Esme's cooking-"Again Emmett interrupted.

"She's coming? Here? We get to see her again?!" He jumped up from the couch, an excited gleam in his eyes but that suddenly went away at his next question. "Does Edward know?"

"No Emmett, Edward doesn't know, now could you sit down and let me finish, please?" Carlisle gave Emmett a firm look and he sat down.

"You mean I'm not going to Austria because of her? And not even her and Edward getting back together and getting our brother back but just her?"

Alice glared at Rosalie, "I repeat Rose; you have all of eternity to go to Austria. And this could lead to getting our brother back. You will be pleasant to her tonight or so help me-"

"CHILDREN! Will you please allow your father to finish?" Esme had walked in and was now looking at her children in a very motherly fashion.

They shut up and she went back to the kitchen.

"Thank you, Esme" Carlisle said as if she was still in the room, but of course she heard him. "Okay then. No more interruptions. Most of you are aware that since we left she has started a fairly successful singing career and is fairly well known. After hearing several of her songs, I got a little worried. You can hear her pain in her songs and it appears as though didn't react to our leaving as Edward had hoped she would. She still seems to be very hurt. I set it up for her to sing in the Children's Ward of the Hospital so that I could see her. It confirmed my suspicions about how she's doing."

While listening the room had grown quiet and grim. Jasper had a very sad, guilty expression. That had been there fear when leaving, that she would take it very hard. That she wouldn't be able to move on. They had tried to tell Edward this but he just wouldn't listen, the stubborn dolt.

"There's a little more to it but I think that Bella should be the one to tell you. It's rather disturbing the lengths that Edward went to, to try and help her be able to move on. I think that he just made it worse for her."

"It's not like Bella's the only one that got hurt by this thing. We lost our brother, you lost your son. He's isolated himself from everyone, she's not the only one that got hurt Carlisle. He was trying to protect her."

"I know Rose, but I'm afraid that he might have done more harm than good. Anyways I just wanted you all to be aware that Bella's emotional state may not be at its best. **(A/N: Poor Jasper)** and to please keep that in mind tonight"

Everyone nodded in agreement, except Alice. Until that moment none of them had noticed that her eyes were glazed over and she had a far away look on her face.

"Alice?" Jasper sat down next to her as she her eyes cleared and she was back in the present. She gave a weak laugh, "Heh heh oops…"

"Everyone looked at her questioningly, "Alice what did you-"at that moment the doorbell rang.

**Sorry for its shortness**


	7. Can't Get Over You

**DISCLAIMER: My name is not Stephenie Meyer. Therefore I do not own twilight. See? Simple. **

**Sorry it has taken so long for me to update my dad has been in the hospital and I have been really busy with school. Anyways here's Chapter 6. The song is Can't Get Over You by Gloria Estefan**

**Chapter 6: Can't Get Over You**

Somewhere in Brazil, Edward sat in the corner of the dark attic of an abandoned house. He was looking out the window watching the sky struggling to think about anything but her if her thought about her too much his resolve would crumble and he would go back to Forks. But he just couldn't stop thinking about her, not for very long. There was no relief from the pain in his cold, unbeating heart. In all these months it hadn't faded, receded, gone away in the least. He ached for her; his entire body ached for her. If he could only see her one more time, she wouldn't even know he was there… _NO! _ _No. If I went and saw her again I wouldn't be able to stay away from her. It's better for her this way, with me gone. She's probably moved on by now._ And even though that her moving on had been what he had wanted for her, the thought of her being with anyone else but him still pained him.

As he was once again fighting against the urge to go back to his angel, his laptop pinged on the desk a few feet away, signaling the arrival of a new message. Edward groaned. He hadn't even wanted the stupid thing; Alice had bought it for him when he had stopped answering his phone. The only reason he kept it was because sending an e-mail every so often kept them off his back. Somewhat. They sent a ton of e-mails begging him to come home, and lately Alice had been e-mailing him constantly, hinting around the Bella subject. He was starting to get angry. Why couldn't his family understand that he just couldn't do that to her? Going back would be pointless; it would just cause her more pain, going back when she had finally had a chance to get over him. Mumbling under his breath about people minding their own business he reluctantly got up to see what his family wanted this time.

When he sat down and looked at the screen he saw that the new message was from Alice. Again. He mumbled incoherently for a minute before opening it. She had just written a short message and there was an attached mp3 file.

_Edward,_

_I'm not trying to hurt you; I'm trying to help you._

_Edward, you're an idiot._

_We all know that you made a mistake when you left Bella and you need to fix it and come back home. I know you think that she's better off without you Edward and that she'll be happier, but she's not. Just listen to this Edward, maybe it'll help you to understand._

_All my love_

_-Alice_

Reluctantly Edward clicked on the attached file and music began to fill the dark attic.

_**There's a part of me that's dying**_

_**Every time I hear your name**_

_**There's a part of me that's trying**_

_**To bring back your love again**_

_**There are times when I just want to run**_

_**But there's no place to hide**_

_**Even though my heart is breaking**_

_**In a million bits inside**_

_**I can make believe that none of this is true**_

Edward just sat there as still as a statue, mouth slightly open, not even breathing. If his heart had been beating, well it wouldn't be anymore. At first the voice had just sounded vaguely familiar; he just couldn't place it, maybe because he had never heard that voice sing before. He was amazed, could that really be her? His angel? Listening to the words he wondered for a moment if there was something to what Alice had written.

_**But I can't forget you**_

_**Can't break free**_

_**I've only got myself to blame**_

_**Nothing feels the same**_

_**Without you**_

_**Can't you see?**_

_**We can find tomorrow**_

_**What we lost yesterday**_

He could hear the pain flowing from her beautiful voice. Letting whoever listened to this song know that these lyrics actually meant something. He knew that his leaving would hurt her for a little while but he thought that she would be able to move on from it, leave it behind her. He wondered if this meant that she still loved him. He started to think about Alice's message more; maybe his leaving had been a mistake.

_**There are nights when I lay wide awake**_

_**Thinking how good it could be**_

_**Other nights, I don't feel worthy**_

_**Of the love you gave to me**_

_**I remember not too long ago**_

_**We were both here to stay**_

_**But it seems it happened overnight**_

_**When I threw it all away**_

_**I can't just walk away and find somebody new**_

How could he have done this to her? How could she think that she wasn't good enough? He had left because _he _wasn't good enough for _her_. He wanted to protect her. He wanted her to have a normal life, to give her a chance to love someone human, to have kids and watch them grow. He could never give her those things, he didn't deserve her. Maybe he should have told her differently, maybe he should have told her the complete truth… but no, she wouldn't have let him go if she knew he still loved her.

_**But I can't forget you  
Can't break free  
I've only got myself to blame  
Nothing feels the same  
Without you  
Can't you see?  
We can find tomorrow  
What we lost yesterday  
What we lost yesterday**_

His resolve was breaking down now. Everything he thought was right didn't seem so right anymore. She was supposed to be happy. His leaving was supposed to be good for her. He knew that it would hurt her at first but he had wrongly assumed that she would be able to get over him. The more he listened to her voice singing, the pain in it, the worse he felt. He had never imagined he could feel worse than he already did but listening to Bella sing tore a hole in him.

_**Hope that I can make you love me once again  
'Cause I can't forget you  
Can't break free  
I've only got myself to blame  
Nothing feels the same  
Without you  
Can't you see?  
We can find tomorrow  
What we lost yesterday  
What we lost yesterday**_

Edward took a sharp breath as he continued to listen. Was what she said the truth? Was that how she really felt? Did she want him back, even after all this time? Was that even a possibility? And if she did, could he even bring himself to go back? Could he bear to go back to her, even though there was nothing in this world that he could possibly want more, could he go back to her knowing how much pain he's caused her? Would going back just cause her more pain? How could he have been such a fool? He should have listened to Alice, to his family. They had been so reluctant to follow his decision and yet they had been right all along. He had no idea what to do, what the right decision was. He wanted Bella, nothing would make him happier than to go back and spend the rest of her life trying to make up for this last year._ Well_ he thought to himself, _when in doubt go talk to the psychic. Oh won't Alice be pleased, after all this time I'm going home. _ He sighed and logged onto the internet starting to search for a plane ticket, Esme and Carlisle were in Maine so maybe he'd get lucky and Alice would be there to.

_**  
But I can't forget you  
Can't forget you**_


End file.
